Grammy Magnet Jack Antonoff Returns to Single Life to Feed His Sonic Muse

It’s over, babes. The marriage that brought Taylor Swift to a New Jersey dive bar has officially reached its final track. Margaret Qualley and Jack Antonoff are allegedly splitting, proving that even a wedding guest list featuring Lana Del Rey and a dozen security guards can’t guarantee a 'happily ever after' if someone keeps humming basslines in their sleep. Word on the street is that Jack’s dedication to the studio was becoming a bit much for the household. You try eating breakfast while three different pop stars are in your kitchen crying about their exes and demanding he find a 'grittier' snare sound for their bridge. Margaret, a literal movie star, probably just wanted to watch a film without Jack trying to remix the dialogue into a 1980s synth anthem. Insiders suggest the break-up was amicable, mostly because Jack is already too busy producing forty-eight albums for the upcoming fiscal quarter. Margaret is reportedly looking forward to a life where her husband doesn't wear socks with sandals inside the house 24/7. Meanwhile, Jack is already scouring the tristate area for a new muse who doesn't mind the smell of overheated vintage amplifiers and the constant presence of a production headset.