KJ Apa To Flee Planet Earth For New Zealand Wilderness By 2026

Alert the stylists and hide the hair dye because KJ Apa has officially checked out of Hollywood reality. The man is planning a trip to New Zealand in 2026, which is basically an eternity in celebrity years. By the time he actually lands in the Southern Hemisphere, we’ll probably be living in underwater pods, but KJ is already packing his bags and his toddler for a rugged homecoming. Word on the street is that KJ is tired of the paparazzi and wants to raise his son, Sasha, in a land where the sheep outnumber the fans three to one. He’s basically turning into a hobbit, minus the hairy feet and plus a six-pack. Insiders say he’s already teaching the kid how to speak 'Kiwi' and how to properly judge someone for putting the wrong spread on their toast. While the rest of us are busy worrying about what we’re having for dinner tonight, KJ is out here living in the future. He’s got his flight booked for a time when flying cars might actually exist. We just hope he realizes that New Zealand isn't actually Middle Earth and he can't just ride a giant eagle back to the set if he forgets his favorite pomade.