Lil Uzi Vert Sues Rehab After Staffer Mistakes Therapy for Unreleased Mixtape

Imagine you’re baring your soul about your diamond-encrusted feelings and some guy in scrubs is in the corner trying to catch the audio in 4K. Lil Uzi Vert is reportedly livid because a staffer at their recovery center allegedly turned a private chat into a pirate radio broadcast. Honestly, Uzi brings such high-octane energy to everything they do that the employee probably just assumed the therapy session was the bridge to a chart-topping summer anthem. Legal papers claim this rogue worker was sneakily recording and sharing confidential sessions like they were drops for a new album. It’s one thing to have your DMs leaked, but having your inner child’s monologue shopped around to the highest bidder is a whole new level of petty. Uzi is now seeking justice for the ultimate breach of the 'no phones in the circle' rule. At this point, Uzi might as well just sample the lawsuit and turn it into a banger. If the staff at the center wanted new music so badly, they could have just waited for the next eclipse or whenever Uzi decides to descend from the mothership. Until then, stay out of the recording booth—which, in this case, was actually just a very expensive couch.