Marilyn Monroe Marrying Men Just to Show Off Cute New Outfits

The blonde bombshell apparently treated her nuptials like a high-stakes runway show where the primary accessory was a temporary husband.

History books tell us Marilyn Monroe was looking for love, but real fashionistas know she was just looking for an excuse to rock a chocolate brown suit with a fur collar. If we’re being honest, Joe DiMaggio was basically a human handbag designed to make her polka dots pop. She didn’t need a marriage license; she needed a mood board and a better steaming iron. From a traditional white gown to a sleek sweater girl vibe, Marilyn treated the altar like the VIP line at a club that only she was cool enough to enter. Why go through the trouble of a wardrobe change at a reception when you can just find an entirely new groom for your next look? It’s called efficiency, darling, and we should all be taking notes on her multi-husband layering technique. By the time she got to Arthur Miller, she was rocking sheer sleeves and probably thinking about what hemline would work best for her fourth hypothetical wedding to a jazz musician or a high-ranking botanist. She didn't have a TYPE of man; she had a type of silk. If you aren't cycling through spouses to justify a shopping spree, are you even a Hollywood legend?