Rock Star Offspring Ruby Stewart Successfully Ambushed by Friends with Tiny Sandwiches

Rod Stewart’s daughter Ruby just survived a targeted emotional hit from her closest companions. Apparently, she thought she was just going about her day like a normal human until her friends leapt from behind the curtains to throw a ‘baby sprinkle.’ For those of you not fluent in upper-crust parenting lingo, a ‘sprinkle’ is basically a baby shower for people who already have all the expensive gear and just want an excuse to eat macarons on a Tuesday. Ruby shared the evidence of the ambush on social media, looking visibly rattled by the sheer amount of pastel-colored balloons and tiny appetizers. It is a known fact that celebrity infants require at least three themed celebrations before they even consider making an appearance, and Ruby is playing the game perfectly. We can only assume the guest list included people who know exactly which brand of organic bamboo swaddle is currently trending. While most of us get a surprise party and end up with a store-bought sheet cake, the Stewart crew keeps it classy. There were probably artisanal floral arrangements that cost more than my first car and enough sparkling cider to float a small yacht. Congrats to Ruby for surviving the terrifying ordeal of being celebrated by rich people in a well-lit room.