Speed Skater Jutta Leerdam Demands Custom Oxygen Tank For Jake Paul's Massive Ego

Jutta Leerdam is used to ice-cold conditions, but nothing could have prepared her for the frostbite-inducing glare of a diamond ring from the world’s loudest YouTube boxer. As she plans her trip down the aisle to meet Jake Paul, Jutta has revealed her absolute wedding must-have: an industrial-grade emotional support system and a gold-plated whistle to blow whenever Jake tries to turn the ceremony into a pay-per-view event. Insiders say Jutta is worried that the sheer density of Jake’s hairstyle might actually alter the gravitational pull of the wedding chapel. To combat this, she’s reportedly requested that the bridesmaids carry tiny ice sculptures of TikTok logos just to make the groom feel at home. It’s a delicate balance between a fairytale wedding and a heavyweight weigh-in, but Jutta is playing it cool like the professional she is. While most brides worry about the cake or the flowers, Jutta is busy ensuring the venue has enough bandwidth for Jake to livestream his first kiss from twelve different angles. She’s reportedly looking into custom lace-trimmed skates just in case she needs to make a high-speed getaway if Mike Tyson shows up as the unexpected flower boy.