Summer Intern Niya Doyle Declares War On Office Coffee Machine Potency

Niya Doyle has officially arrived, and we aren't just talking about her bylines! While the rest of us are struggling to find the delete key, Niya is out here collecting publications like they’re limited edition Pokémon cards. Sources say her first order of business as an intern was demanding a desk made entirely of vintage glossy magazines, because wood is just too 'mainstream' for her aesthetic. Word on the street is Niya Doyle has a five-year plan that includes replacing every generic office chair with a velvet throne. She’s already been seen side-eyeing the breakroom snacks, allegedly suggesting that if the gluten-free crackers aren't artisanally crafted by a monk in the mountains, they are simply not fit for the masthead. Honestly? We stan a discerning Queen of Typography. She’s moving through the editorial world with the confidence of a woman who knows exactly which font is the most threatening. If you see her in the hallway, don't look directly at her clip-on earrings or you might get blinded by her sheer potential. Niya isn't just writing the news—she’s judging your choice of serif. Watch out, world, the intern era is about to get a lot more fashionable.